Once again, I hit the beach and God shows up!
As my daughter and I were walking the beach [slowly for now - lol], we noticed something in the surf at the first sand bar. At closer inspection, we realized there was what we thought a whale stuck in the sand bar just getting hit by wave after wave after wave, barely able to recover from the first to the next. Obviously laboring, we watched, anxiously waiting for this beautiful creature to break free.
As we inched closer and closer, we realized it was not one, not two, but three whales [or we think it may have been manatees because I don't think we have belugas here]! They were huddled close as if hanging on together through this crazy, chaotic storm. It seemed they were tired, waiting even, for it to end and find the calmness of the ocean deep. We sat and watched as the current moved them northward rather than the opportunity to head back out. All the while, these three held on to one another that I swear there was, at no point, release or separation.
Of course, we called the Coast Guard and walked parallel to the never-ending wave breaks, feeling helpless to assist. Suddenly, with a great burst of energy, they seemed to break free and together, still hanging on as a group, they swam into the break line. We walked another quarter of a mile to ensure the strong current did not carry them back in to shore. I believe they made it through and back into the vast ocean.
As we watched and the sun gave way to the moon, we tried to spot them, to somehow be comforted in knowing that they, together, conquered what probably seemed to them a great storm. In that moment, I saw clearly what I had been asking God about from the moment I stepped onto the beach.
I even realized the point we tried to get across to the kids this week at children's church. The basic gist being that when you love God, you do things for others....love one another basically...serve others, not just yourself...hang on tight to your family and friends - those that WILL work together to get through and back to where you are supposed to be...where you belong.
We can weather storms on our own in this lifetime and we may be okay and make it through. But when we weather the storms with God, with family, with friends, it is alot easier to bear. Just like those three whales [or manatees...lol], hang on tight - do NOT let go, as those waves crash and those storms hit, reserve your energy and gather your strength. Then, when you see that break - that light shining through, go for it and swim like there's no tomorrow because there is a vast ocean out there...blessings you cannot even imagine.
Sometimes we get stuck, sometimes wave after wave keeps knocking us down, and sometimes we come very close to hitting that shoreline that sucks the life out of you but...those storms, those crashing waves trying to overtake you and wash you BACK to the shoreline...that is an opportunity for God to work...to align your life in such a way that no storm, no wave, no sandbar can affect your ability to break free and find what the ocean of life has to offer. :-)
Monday, August 24, 2009
Surrender 8/13/09
Surrender means growth & progress. Ultimately, it is surrender to God but in the physical, often, it is letting go of control. That can be good & bad. If we were left to live a Godly life by our own strength or make wise choices by our own processes, we wd be in a mess. Do not confuse surrender with passivity. It is a proactive process-a day to day choice...struggle even...to allow (trust) God's will to steer ur life & decisions...a choice to let go of what you want & moving forward in what you know...trusting God to make straight the path before you & order ur steps.
Letting Go. 8/9/09
At the beach, I am blessed.
Read my pieces blog or u may not get today's insightful epiphany....so, based on recent life, I spend time trying to sort thru the myriad of emotions intricately intwined in divorce/life. My walks on the beach allow me peace & introspection to truly seek God's will in my life & freedom to express anger, frustration, regret, loss, failure, fear, even relief, joy, expectation,happiness freedom to trust in who I am & who I hope to become for myself & my kids.
In my efforts to find "beauty in the pieces" that I so often blog about, I was picking up the reminders God always provides along the shoreline. My hands were getting full & I dropped a piece. I quickly turned around to retrieve it. That still, small voice said, "No. Let that go." This contradicts all that God has shown me, right? No.
Once again, the big man upstairs enlarges the picture. You see, we are to find the beauty in the pieces-whether that be happiness, joy, blessings or pain, anguish, loss...there is beauty to be found in life (pieces) that makes us who we are. Herein lies today's lesson in faith-trusting every piece has a purpose. Not hanging on so tightly & carrying armloads with us through life. At some point, it becomes a heavy, difficult burden. Not only that, how do we continue to see the beauty in the pieces left much less pick them up to see? There comes the time where the lesson is learned, the purpose realized. At that point, we must make room for more...we must let go. In this realization, I took all the pieces I was carrying & realized my load has been heavy for quite some time & I'm missing the beauty God has for me NOW. Each piece, I saw a lesson learned, my heart broken, a forfeited marriage, provisional struggles, lack of faith, fear, loss, expectations unmet, even low self worth. I reminded myself that His word is true & never comes back void. I can let go, have faith & move on to what He has NOW. I threw every piece out there & walked forward ready to pick up more... :-)
Read my pieces blog or u may not get today's insightful epiphany....so, based on recent life, I spend time trying to sort thru the myriad of emotions intricately intwined in divorce/life. My walks on the beach allow me peace & introspection to truly seek God's will in my life & freedom to express anger, frustration, regret, loss, failure, fear, even relief, joy, expectation,happiness freedom to trust in who I am & who I hope to become for myself & my kids.
In my efforts to find "beauty in the pieces" that I so often blog about, I was picking up the reminders God always provides along the shoreline. My hands were getting full & I dropped a piece. I quickly turned around to retrieve it. That still, small voice said, "No. Let that go." This contradicts all that God has shown me, right? No.
Once again, the big man upstairs enlarges the picture. You see, we are to find the beauty in the pieces-whether that be happiness, joy, blessings or pain, anguish, loss...there is beauty to be found in life (pieces) that makes us who we are. Herein lies today's lesson in faith-trusting every piece has a purpose. Not hanging on so tightly & carrying armloads with us through life. At some point, it becomes a heavy, difficult burden. Not only that, how do we continue to see the beauty in the pieces left much less pick them up to see? There comes the time where the lesson is learned, the purpose realized. At that point, we must make room for more...we must let go. In this realization, I took all the pieces I was carrying & realized my load has been heavy for quite some time & I'm missing the beauty God has for me NOW. Each piece, I saw a lesson learned, my heart broken, a forfeited marriage, provisional struggles, lack of faith, fear, loss, expectations unmet, even low self worth. I reminded myself that His word is true & never comes back void. I can let go, have faith & move on to what He has NOW. I threw every piece out there & walked forward ready to pick up more... :-)
Don't Let 'Em See Ya Sweat! 8/4/09
LOL. Appropriate title I think.
So many times in life, we put on these happy faces when inside we are just falling apart. We forget to see the strength in weakness - the bravery in transparency. Yes, discern when, where & who to trust but know we were not created to walk alone. Not only will Jesus walk with us but God places people in our life to hold us up when we can't seem to do it on our own. The whole season, reason or a lifetime (people in ur life) is true but I think rather than listen and believe which of those applies....well, we tend to often choose on our own, missing out on a blessing by letting go to soon or hurting ourselves by hanging on too tight to the ones we should let go of. If this season of my life has taught me anything, it is to trust in Christ in me....to listen, hear and act as if my life depended on it...because it does. :-)
So many times in life, we put on these happy faces when inside we are just falling apart. We forget to see the strength in weakness - the bravery in transparency. Yes, discern when, where & who to trust but know we were not created to walk alone. Not only will Jesus walk with us but God places people in our life to hold us up when we can't seem to do it on our own. The whole season, reason or a lifetime (people in ur life) is true but I think rather than listen and believe which of those applies....well, we tend to often choose on our own, missing out on a blessing by letting go to soon or hurting ourselves by hanging on too tight to the ones we should let go of. If this season of my life has taught me anything, it is to trust in Christ in me....to listen, hear and act as if my life depended on it...because it does. :-)
Pray. Ask. Believe. Forgive. 7/31/09
Pray. Ask, Believe. Forgive.
In Mark 11, Jesus drove those from the temple courts that were buying and selling – an instance when we see anger…maybe not anger but true conviction of the sanctity of His Father’s house. Mark 11:22-25 he teaches, “Have faith in God…I tell you the truth if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
We go through life encountering mountain after mountain – it is all individually subjective. We often come to God with petition to save us, to keep us from those things that hurt - that hold us down, tie us to the world even. In everyday life, we forget the basic simple truth of believing. I know that in every blog I hit on this but this is what I know needs to be put out there in our generation.
Without the basic knowledge that we have the power of Christ in us and the bible tells us that mountain can be moved by the power of our words [powered by our faith/belief], what hope do we have?
Look at Paul’s example – while in chains and worldly bondage, Paul says in Phillipians 1:19, “for I know through your prayers and the help given me by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance.” I mean, wow. This is a man that believed not only in his ability to believe and pray but in others power to lift him up in prayer!
Day to day, we all intend to pray for others – it is even put on our hearts…but, we get caught up in our own world, our own time constraints, our own mountains. Often, we feel we do not have the time to pray for ourselves much less others. This morning, I found God putting it on my heart to pray for a few people and I felt as if I did not have the time to properly petition God for myself much less on others’ behalf…you know, God expects paragraphs right? Sometimes, yes but often - LOL – wrong.
How simple it is to take even just a few minutes to be obedient [God doesn’t need the whole scoop, he already knows it] and how important, as we see by Paul’s example, to lift others up before the throne – to dispatch that which God has for them. You never know why but you can guess that usually when it is put on your heart, it is because that person’s strength and belief is being tested and they need to move a mountain. Also, when we pray for others and take the focus off of ourselves, miraculously, God gives back focus/revelation into our own lives [the Word never comes back void, remember?]. Remember, Phillipians 2:3-4, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”
This verse touched me this morning in many ways. Sometimes, I get caught up in my own life and the answers I NEED, that I do not realize how it affects others around me. My focus becomes so intense that I alienate and even shut out others in my life. There are times, this is necessary and God will even direct your path in such a way that it is the only way to breakthrough. I am guilty of having to separate myself from people and things that drain me to a point of not being able to focus on the direction I needed to take. Partially motivated by God’s direction but a portion motivated by fear/flesh. Sometimes we just need that break from situations or people and we have to recognize it for what it is – what WE determine we need. At times, our behavior becomes an obstacle to others and the bible teaches us to love one another as Christ loved the church. Would Jesus make those choices? It is clear in Romans 14:13, “Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way.” We, inadvertently, become a stumbling block when our focus is ONLY ourselves. Me? Guilty as charged.
So, when God speaks to your heart and places another on your mind, pray for them, ask for them, believe for them…go before the throne with no bitterness or unforgiveness in your life and you CAN and WILL help others’ move their mountains. In the process, yours will be thrown into the sea as well.
We are here for a purpose and I cannot think of any better reason than this: Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”
Faith Up!
In Mark 11, Jesus drove those from the temple courts that were buying and selling – an instance when we see anger…maybe not anger but true conviction of the sanctity of His Father’s house. Mark 11:22-25 he teaches, “Have faith in God…I tell you the truth if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
We go through life encountering mountain after mountain – it is all individually subjective. We often come to God with petition to save us, to keep us from those things that hurt - that hold us down, tie us to the world even. In everyday life, we forget the basic simple truth of believing. I know that in every blog I hit on this but this is what I know needs to be put out there in our generation.
Without the basic knowledge that we have the power of Christ in us and the bible tells us that mountain can be moved by the power of our words [powered by our faith/belief], what hope do we have?
Look at Paul’s example – while in chains and worldly bondage, Paul says in Phillipians 1:19, “for I know through your prayers and the help given me by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance.” I mean, wow. This is a man that believed not only in his ability to believe and pray but in others power to lift him up in prayer!
Day to day, we all intend to pray for others – it is even put on our hearts…but, we get caught up in our own world, our own time constraints, our own mountains. Often, we feel we do not have the time to pray for ourselves much less others. This morning, I found God putting it on my heart to pray for a few people and I felt as if I did not have the time to properly petition God for myself much less on others’ behalf…you know, God expects paragraphs right? Sometimes, yes but often - LOL – wrong.
How simple it is to take even just a few minutes to be obedient [God doesn’t need the whole scoop, he already knows it] and how important, as we see by Paul’s example, to lift others up before the throne – to dispatch that which God has for them. You never know why but you can guess that usually when it is put on your heart, it is because that person’s strength and belief is being tested and they need to move a mountain. Also, when we pray for others and take the focus off of ourselves, miraculously, God gives back focus/revelation into our own lives [the Word never comes back void, remember?]. Remember, Phillipians 2:3-4, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”
This verse touched me this morning in many ways. Sometimes, I get caught up in my own life and the answers I NEED, that I do not realize how it affects others around me. My focus becomes so intense that I alienate and even shut out others in my life. There are times, this is necessary and God will even direct your path in such a way that it is the only way to breakthrough. I am guilty of having to separate myself from people and things that drain me to a point of not being able to focus on the direction I needed to take. Partially motivated by God’s direction but a portion motivated by fear/flesh. Sometimes we just need that break from situations or people and we have to recognize it for what it is – what WE determine we need. At times, our behavior becomes an obstacle to others and the bible teaches us to love one another as Christ loved the church. Would Jesus make those choices? It is clear in Romans 14:13, “Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way.” We, inadvertently, become a stumbling block when our focus is ONLY ourselves. Me? Guilty as charged.
So, when God speaks to your heart and places another on your mind, pray for them, ask for them, believe for them…go before the throne with no bitterness or unforgiveness in your life and you CAN and WILL help others’ move their mountains. In the process, yours will be thrown into the sea as well.
We are here for a purpose and I cannot think of any better reason than this: Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”
Faith Up!
Endurance 7/27/09
So, in children's church all month long we have talked about forgiveness and faith....many times referencing the story of Joseph. You know his story - he interpreted dreams right? His father gave him a colorful coat right? The real story in his life is that his brothers took his clothes, threw him in a pit, sold him into slavery, people lied about him and he got thrown in jail...ultimately, despite major life obstacles, he ended up in leadership, 2nd to only Pharoah - in Egypt no less! The endurance and faith this man showed in the face of insurmountable odds it seemed...well, why the heck didn't he just give up? Because he KNEW God had a calling on his life and he BELIEVED.
In my morning reading, this story was brought to my attention again - I love how God works sometimes. Last week, a friend confided a revelation/epiphany about how the power is inside of you...we just GIVE other things in our life the power. This was again driven home by a dear friend who spoke this week. Then again, by my brother in Christ's blog [check it out under jeff letourneau's blog - good stuff]. We not only give things power in this world but we hand over our power every day to others.
This is what God has been speaking to me for weeks and as usual, it takes him basically knocking me on my butte to actually get it.I speak for me but I think we all get distracted by life. So focused on what others think - why they are avoiding us, why they think what they think, why no one can see who we really are [or so we think]....we get so caught up in this mindset that we give our power to others or we hand it over willingly [but unknowingly sometimes] to the destructive paths in our life. The problem is that when God speaks, we believe it right then but moving forward in that, we let what we SEE affect what we BELIEVE.
In Hebrews 11:1 it states, "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." If we know God is speaking into our lives or giving us specific wisdom in some area, why do we doubt? Why do we modify it based on what others say? If someone hears something different from God, does thast mean what God spoke to you is void? No, it means God's plans are not our own and he weaves it together the way he wants to. The obedience in what He speaks TO YOU is the important part. In obedience, He will make known what He wants to make known in His timing.
How was Joseph not influenced by his brothers or his surroundings? How great an endurance he had in faith. Why, when we do not see immediate results, are we doubtful of what we were told? Many times, God delays on purpose and the delay is just as much of an answer to your prayer as the fulfillment is when it comes.
Boy, did this hit me like a ton of bricks this morning.In Mark 9, there is the story of a man whose son was possessed, could not speak, and had seizures. He told Jesus that the disciples could not cast out the spirit...he then goes on to ask Jesus if he can, would he drive it out. Imagine Jesus' frustration. He wondered aloud how long he would have to stay with such an unbelieving generation - how then must he feel about our generation? Oh my!
Anyhow, in Mark 9:23, Jesus says, " If you can?...Everything is possible for him who believes." Did you hear? EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE FOR HIM WHO BELIEVES. We must believe God's word or not. Those are the only two choices we have. We cannot be moved by what we see or feel. We must stand firm despite what the world throws at us - or what people throw at us, purposely and unknowingly. Reach a point, where you are not giving the power to your emotions, to your actions, to your heart even - but always giving the power to your faith. Do not be moved by the world, do not be moved by fear, but be moved by your faith - KNOW that it is not what you see but what God's word in your life promises. Do look for Godly confirmation but do not hang all your hopes on the opinion of others. Believe me, I know from firsthand experience that it does not work.
Know who you are despite what others may say or think...even despite your own insecurities, inaction, disobedience...life mistakes. No one is perfect - don't let 'em fool ya. God uses those things in our life that may be displeasing to Him - to teach us, to train us, to refine us into what He already sees and knows that we are and what He continuously tries to tell us.This may be too personal but you guys know my transparency, I went to a conference last week and God brought alot of things up for me....first and foremost, I hang my head always...He tells me to lift my face to Him - He sees me differently than I see me. He knows the purpose, I just need to BELIEVE there is one. I was singing the song...do not know the name but the words in the chorus are Wonderful, Beautiful, Glorious [maybe not in that order]...as I lifted my face up toward him, I felt He was singing it right back. THAT, people, is how God feels about each and every one of us despite our unbelief/sins.
His promise is evident in Phillipians 3:13-14, "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."So, continue to fight the good fight, know God's power is not OVER you but IN you. Stay in His word and BELIEVE that every word from God applies to your life too. Have endurance in the face of trials/tests.. BELIEVE that God speaks to you and know His word NEVER comes back void. When He speaks, ask for confirmation and then run with it and be obedient! Know that you will make mistakes. Know that not everyone will "get" you or even like you and that is okay - try to make it right but move on. Know that God will delay blessings in your life - it's training ground - make the most of it! Most importantly, KNOW that His promises ARE real and keep BELIEVING!
Faith up!
In my morning reading, this story was brought to my attention again - I love how God works sometimes. Last week, a friend confided a revelation/epiphany about how the power is inside of you...we just GIVE other things in our life the power. This was again driven home by a dear friend who spoke this week. Then again, by my brother in Christ's blog [check it out under jeff letourneau's blog - good stuff]. We not only give things power in this world but we hand over our power every day to others.
This is what God has been speaking to me for weeks and as usual, it takes him basically knocking me on my butte to actually get it.I speak for me but I think we all get distracted by life. So focused on what others think - why they are avoiding us, why they think what they think, why no one can see who we really are [or so we think]....we get so caught up in this mindset that we give our power to others or we hand it over willingly [but unknowingly sometimes] to the destructive paths in our life. The problem is that when God speaks, we believe it right then but moving forward in that, we let what we SEE affect what we BELIEVE.
In Hebrews 11:1 it states, "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." If we know God is speaking into our lives or giving us specific wisdom in some area, why do we doubt? Why do we modify it based on what others say? If someone hears something different from God, does thast mean what God spoke to you is void? No, it means God's plans are not our own and he weaves it together the way he wants to. The obedience in what He speaks TO YOU is the important part. In obedience, He will make known what He wants to make known in His timing.
How was Joseph not influenced by his brothers or his surroundings? How great an endurance he had in faith. Why, when we do not see immediate results, are we doubtful of what we were told? Many times, God delays on purpose and the delay is just as much of an answer to your prayer as the fulfillment is when it comes.
Boy, did this hit me like a ton of bricks this morning.In Mark 9, there is the story of a man whose son was possessed, could not speak, and had seizures. He told Jesus that the disciples could not cast out the spirit...he then goes on to ask Jesus if he can, would he drive it out. Imagine Jesus' frustration. He wondered aloud how long he would have to stay with such an unbelieving generation - how then must he feel about our generation? Oh my!
Anyhow, in Mark 9:23, Jesus says, " If you can?...Everything is possible for him who believes." Did you hear? EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE FOR HIM WHO BELIEVES. We must believe God's word or not. Those are the only two choices we have. We cannot be moved by what we see or feel. We must stand firm despite what the world throws at us - or what people throw at us, purposely and unknowingly. Reach a point, where you are not giving the power to your emotions, to your actions, to your heart even - but always giving the power to your faith. Do not be moved by the world, do not be moved by fear, but be moved by your faith - KNOW that it is not what you see but what God's word in your life promises. Do look for Godly confirmation but do not hang all your hopes on the opinion of others. Believe me, I know from firsthand experience that it does not work.
Know who you are despite what others may say or think...even despite your own insecurities, inaction, disobedience...life mistakes. No one is perfect - don't let 'em fool ya. God uses those things in our life that may be displeasing to Him - to teach us, to train us, to refine us into what He already sees and knows that we are and what He continuously tries to tell us.This may be too personal but you guys know my transparency, I went to a conference last week and God brought alot of things up for me....first and foremost, I hang my head always...He tells me to lift my face to Him - He sees me differently than I see me. He knows the purpose, I just need to BELIEVE there is one. I was singing the song...do not know the name but the words in the chorus are Wonderful, Beautiful, Glorious [maybe not in that order]...as I lifted my face up toward him, I felt He was singing it right back. THAT, people, is how God feels about each and every one of us despite our unbelief/sins.
His promise is evident in Phillipians 3:13-14, "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."So, continue to fight the good fight, know God's power is not OVER you but IN you. Stay in His word and BELIEVE that every word from God applies to your life too. Have endurance in the face of trials/tests.. BELIEVE that God speaks to you and know His word NEVER comes back void. When He speaks, ask for confirmation and then run with it and be obedient! Know that you will make mistakes. Know that not everyone will "get" you or even like you and that is okay - try to make it right but move on. Know that God will delay blessings in your life - it's training ground - make the most of it! Most importantly, KNOW that His promises ARE real and keep BELIEVING!
Faith up!
LOVE 7/13/09
...and the greatest of these is LOVE...What is love?
Love is painful, conditional at times, a void that we all seek to fill whether we realize it or not. It hurts. Love can cause your heart to literally ache....to feel so much...to be vulnerable enough to put it all out there and hope for the best but often, expect the worst.What is love supposed to be? It is supposed to be unconditional, beautiful, a commitment regardless of another's actions...a forgiveness that has no bounds. This is not limited to the love between man and a woman but the love of family, friends, children, people in general. There is a saying that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all...also, that to love is a risk....to lose is bittersweet but to gain is the ultimate gift.
We all are uniquely and wonderfully made with the capacity to love without prejudice. The choices we make, the risks we take...well those moments are what defines who we are.I never want to become jaded - I want to always love with everything I have. I want to be the person I am meant to be...emotional scars and all....if God loves me the way I am, others should too. :-) I always want to be transparent, vulnerable [in a healthy way], and open to everything life has to offer. I will not limit who I know myself to be, who I even choose to be. I will not compromise the love I have to offer based on the risks I have taken that did not pan out. I will love with everything I am and have until I get it right in God's eyes.
1 Cor 13:4-7Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.So, bring on the pain, the suffering, the anguish, the yearning for that one person in the world or those people to surround yourself with that "get" who you are....I willingly jump in because I know on the other side of that, God has great things in store.
Peace.
Imperfection [Pieces] 7/8/09
On my beach run this morning…well…errr…okay, mainly walk [but hey I was tired!]….as usual, I listened, God spoke.
The main gist is learning to speak less and listen more. Sometimes, we are so busy “talking,” we just cannot hear. Come on now, we all relate to that…at least I do and pretty much everybody I know! LOL. We get caught up in what we think we hear that we do not try to clarify or understand it but we do one of two things….we run with it prematurely or we analyze it to a fault. Then, we look back and wonder why the heck everything fell apart.
Perfection is overrated. I have spent my entire life chasing after this wholeness that, quite honestly, does not exist. It is the pieces along the way that weave the pattern of life and bring you to where you are supposed to be – please NOTE that I said where you are SUPPOSED to be not necessarily where you WANT to be.
I will tell you a little story that happened to me a few years ago – I will not elaborate on the details just the main point.
I was at a very difficult time in my life…my family’s life. I was searching for answers and depending on the promises I felt, even knew, God had on my life, my [at the time] husband’s life, and my kids’ life. A group of us [well, two couples…] were walking along the beach. We kind of each drifted off in our own direction, looking for shells, relaxing, whatever. As I walked, I found myself asking God for proof that He was still there….walking through life with me, questioning my own faith, direction, and obedience. I kept seeing pieces of sand dollars along the way and thought to myself how nice it would be to find a whole one. Please, Lord, let me find a beautiful sand dollar so I know you are with me. Weird I guess but this was my process – lol. I became frustrated as the pieces of all sizes kept “littering” my path along the shoreline. God, geez, couldn’t ya just let me find one? I mean, C’mon! As I walked I felt God speaking to me and about my life and different paths that I chose, even paths that chose me…how each one was an intricate part of the design of who I am. Each weathered piece, big or small, broken or scratched, ultimately made me who I am. He began speaking about how each piece is a beautiful treasure to cherish, to learn from, to overcome, to conquer…to accept. Ahhhh. Acceptance? God, are you joking? Anyhow, I then saw the pieces differently, not as ugly, misshapen, broken, but tidbits to cherish with unique characteristics. Related to life, the pieces are what we miss every single day because we are seeking that “perfection,” that wholeness of self….wholeness of or perfection in others…totally missing the beauty in the pieces, life’s ups and downs…whether success or failure…that make us who we are...the wholeness for THAT point in our life. So, as I walked [and cried – you guys know how I am], I started apologizing to God for my selfishness, my expectations of what I want in my life, expectations of what I want Him to do, what I expect of myself…of my family….not being able to be content and accept every little piece that comes my way, knowing that God not only brings people into my life but me into theirs, leading me to the greater path that He has for me. I then told God I didn’t want to find a whole sand dollar – I wanted to see the beauty in the pieces. I felt God healing me in a way as to speak directly to my heart that He already sees me as whole and He provides ALL of the pieces along the way – it is my choice whether I pick them up and realize and respect the beauty in it. He assured me that I can be whole, a piece at a time….that He fits things together in His time, not mine. Needless to say, when I laid down myself and my motives and LISTENED to God’s, I ended up walking away that day with, YES, a beautiful perfect sand dollar. Since that time, in my moments of weakness, hurt or frustration, the beach is my peace. I have been away too long – for a few years, I forgot the lesson I learned that day. But, when I stop and listen, He reminds me and confirms His plan on my life – not my own. Often, since that indefinable walk on the beach, God has spoken to me through the sand dollar pieces and many beautiful “wholes.”
You see I was so busy “talking” to myself and “talking” to God and, yes, praying, fasting, etc….but what I failed to see was that I was not LISTENING. I thought I was but the more I thought I was, the more I thought God needed to HEAR. Yes, lol, I thought I had to plead my case before God, litigation style. As we all know, God already knows what we need before we ask and He knows our hearts intimately. It was not until I went off on my own and remained quiet and introspective, that I could truly hear what He was speaking to me.
I find myself, once again, in life’s “crosshairs” but the difference now, is I am stopping and taking the time to ask and, more importantly, LISTEN. It is day to day but, when I make the time, like this morning, God opens my eyes and ears and allows me to see the beauty he created in the “pieces.”
There is beauty in sadness, pain, loss, frustration, even anger. IT is life. There is beauty in the imperfections of self, the imperfections of others….rejecting that is easy, acceptance is the hard part.
The main gist is learning to speak less and listen more. Sometimes, we are so busy “talking,” we just cannot hear. Come on now, we all relate to that…at least I do and pretty much everybody I know! LOL. We get caught up in what we think we hear that we do not try to clarify or understand it but we do one of two things….we run with it prematurely or we analyze it to a fault. Then, we look back and wonder why the heck everything fell apart.
Perfection is overrated. I have spent my entire life chasing after this wholeness that, quite honestly, does not exist. It is the pieces along the way that weave the pattern of life and bring you to where you are supposed to be – please NOTE that I said where you are SUPPOSED to be not necessarily where you WANT to be.
I will tell you a little story that happened to me a few years ago – I will not elaborate on the details just the main point.
I was at a very difficult time in my life…my family’s life. I was searching for answers and depending on the promises I felt, even knew, God had on my life, my [at the time] husband’s life, and my kids’ life. A group of us [well, two couples…] were walking along the beach. We kind of each drifted off in our own direction, looking for shells, relaxing, whatever. As I walked, I found myself asking God for proof that He was still there….walking through life with me, questioning my own faith, direction, and obedience. I kept seeing pieces of sand dollars along the way and thought to myself how nice it would be to find a whole one. Please, Lord, let me find a beautiful sand dollar so I know you are with me. Weird I guess but this was my process – lol. I became frustrated as the pieces of all sizes kept “littering” my path along the shoreline. God, geez, couldn’t ya just let me find one? I mean, C’mon! As I walked I felt God speaking to me and about my life and different paths that I chose, even paths that chose me…how each one was an intricate part of the design of who I am. Each weathered piece, big or small, broken or scratched, ultimately made me who I am. He began speaking about how each piece is a beautiful treasure to cherish, to learn from, to overcome, to conquer…to accept. Ahhhh. Acceptance? God, are you joking? Anyhow, I then saw the pieces differently, not as ugly, misshapen, broken, but tidbits to cherish with unique characteristics. Related to life, the pieces are what we miss every single day because we are seeking that “perfection,” that wholeness of self….wholeness of or perfection in others…totally missing the beauty in the pieces, life’s ups and downs…whether success or failure…that make us who we are...the wholeness for THAT point in our life. So, as I walked [and cried – you guys know how I am], I started apologizing to God for my selfishness, my expectations of what I want in my life, expectations of what I want Him to do, what I expect of myself…of my family….not being able to be content and accept every little piece that comes my way, knowing that God not only brings people into my life but me into theirs, leading me to the greater path that He has for me. I then told God I didn’t want to find a whole sand dollar – I wanted to see the beauty in the pieces. I felt God healing me in a way as to speak directly to my heart that He already sees me as whole and He provides ALL of the pieces along the way – it is my choice whether I pick them up and realize and respect the beauty in it. He assured me that I can be whole, a piece at a time….that He fits things together in His time, not mine. Needless to say, when I laid down myself and my motives and LISTENED to God’s, I ended up walking away that day with, YES, a beautiful perfect sand dollar. Since that time, in my moments of weakness, hurt or frustration, the beach is my peace. I have been away too long – for a few years, I forgot the lesson I learned that day. But, when I stop and listen, He reminds me and confirms His plan on my life – not my own. Often, since that indefinable walk on the beach, God has spoken to me through the sand dollar pieces and many beautiful “wholes.”
You see I was so busy “talking” to myself and “talking” to God and, yes, praying, fasting, etc….but what I failed to see was that I was not LISTENING. I thought I was but the more I thought I was, the more I thought God needed to HEAR. Yes, lol, I thought I had to plead my case before God, litigation style. As we all know, God already knows what we need before we ask and He knows our hearts intimately. It was not until I went off on my own and remained quiet and introspective, that I could truly hear what He was speaking to me.
I find myself, once again, in life’s “crosshairs” but the difference now, is I am stopping and taking the time to ask and, more importantly, LISTEN. It is day to day but, when I make the time, like this morning, God opens my eyes and ears and allows me to see the beauty he created in the “pieces.”
There is beauty in sadness, pain, loss, frustration, even anger. IT is life. There is beauty in the imperfections of self, the imperfections of others….rejecting that is easy, acceptance is the hard part.
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